Thursday, November 12, 2015

Real Life

I posted this picture on Instagram the other day and it was so nice to be real...to share what life really looks like. To admit that we do not have it all together and our life is anything but perfect.


This was my caption:
See this smile? This smile masks the fact that I pooped in the tub tonight with my sister in there with me. Then mom moved me to another tub where I pooped yet again. Earlier in the day I wrote all over the couch with an ink pen. Where was mom while I did that? She was fishing out an Elsa toy that I threw in the toilet. No worries...I just smile this sweet smile and mom forgets what a terror I am.

I am so guilty of always posting these precious pictures of my kids...smiling, laughing, doing something adorable. But let me be honest and say that 80% of the time...that is not reality. Life is absolute chaos most of the time and our days are filled with tears, screaming, fights, tantrums, messiness, spankings, and meltdowns. Of course there are special moments tucked in each day, but real life is not what we put on social media most of the time. I want to be sure to remember the wonderful memories, but I also want to keep it real and make sure I am not putting out a false sense of perfection. When I look back on these days, I want to remember the good and the bad. Real life. Being a mom to little ones is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. I constantly fail, mess up and do wrong...and that is ok...it is all a part of life and life is messy. Hold on tight cause things are about to get real in here...

Let's start with my home...
My sink is always full of dirty dishes and most of the time there is some sort of odor coming from the sink or the garbage. My fridge looks like a ghost town 99% of the time and you are guaranteed to find a mountain of laundry at any given moment. The kids rooms are usually a disaster, the playroom looks like the aftermath of a hurricane and my toilets never seem to get rid of that brown ring around the water. Real life right there. Oh and don't even get me started on the backseat of my car. I cannot even begin to describe some of the yuckiness that exists back there.




My children...
Yes they are doggone cute...but they can also make me want to pull my hair out. Aubrey Lane gets a spanking pretty much everyday at naptime and it never fails that we are screaming, "I love you too...now go to bed".  Aubrey has not mastered table manners by a longshot and it is a given that if someone is over for dinner...she will toot. Real life. Weston Hayes is the cutest little redhead I have ever seen, but that boy has a temper. I've seen him chunk a toy hammer at his sister's head just because he wanted her Cinderella doll. The other day, I was correcting him for saying something in a mean voice and he informed me that he was gonna "punch me in the face". Oh Lordy Bee. Yes I laughed...and then I put him in time out. Weston is in a constant state of frustration and his tears are endless. Sometimes I think he forgets what he is upset about and just enjoys the fussing. Going out in public is a very scary thing. I never really know how my two stinkers are going to act. Can't tell you how many times I've left a buggy full of groceries and high-tailed it out the door with screaming kids tucked under my arms.  The other day I attempted to finish printing off a few checks for work and I realize the kiddos are very quiet. That ALWAYS means something is up.  I go into Weston's room and find that Aubrey is changing his diaper. He is perfectly content to let her change him and by golly I just let her finish!  Again...real life means you do what you gotta do.




This is how Weston does Target.


My hubby...
My hubby and I are not immune to imperfection either. We fight...we get upset with each other...we go hours (sometimes days) without talking and honestly we forget what we were upset about in the first place. We bribe each other for who will bath the kids, who will change the next poopy, who will fix breakfast...it is just how we roll.  We rarely cuddle or get to watch movies and when we do have a few moments together, we always end up talking about the kids. Daily life is not romantic for us. Dinner involves feeding one kid with the "airplane" method and the other with threatening spankings. Dinner talk is limited to "we do not fart at the table" or  "do not feed your food to the dog".  We rarely do things together, but instead our days our filled with the "tag-team" method. "You clean up the kitchen, I'll bathe the kids.  You take out the trash, I'll empty the dishwasher." Sometime we crash into bed at 10:00 at night and realize we didn't have one meaningful conversation all day. It's just a season. I know our marriage will not always take a backseat to two screaming kids.  One day babe...One day.

Myself...
I am constantly in workout clothes or gym shorts.  My body feels weird when I put on jeans because it is such a rare thing. Washing my hair has become a once a week luxury. I laughed when my mother in law asked if I needed to restock on my make-up because I honestly hadn't even opened the foundation that I ordered a few months back! My body after kids is not solid or fit. I can't tell you the last time I could do a jumping jack without peeing on myself. HAHA. Life is not about me right now. Oh how I long to use the potty alone....without an audience who likes to broadcast my business to the whole world. Weston loves to announce in public bathrooms..."mommy you made a tee tee"!   How amazing would it be to take a bath without two squirming bodies spraying me with squirt toys? Maybe in 5 years...

Overview...
Why do I share all this?  Hopefully not for anyone to call CPS on us. No, I share because this crazy, messy, hectic, loud life is REAL. It is not perfection and it never will be. When I look back on this season of my life, I want to laugh and remember the good and the bad. The beautiful and the horrendous.  The fun and the failures. The fragrant and the stinky. My family is everything to me and we are blessed beyond measure. Not a day passes that I don't thank my Lord for the abundant blessings that I have. However, life is not picture perfect and I am so thankful for the ability to stop in the middle of these chaotic moments and just realize that it is okay to embrace the imperfections. It's ok to have children that still need training and guidance. It's ok that my marriage has ups and downs. It's ok that my body is not perfect or my wardrobe isn't as fashionable as I'd like. It's ok that my house is messy and cluttered.  The only thing that matters is we are healthy, happy and have each other. I read a quote that said, "So what if your life is messy. Perfect isn't the plan. Purpose is."

Oh may it be so in our home. May we live life with purpose to do what is right, love others and honor God. That is all that truly matters.


So here's to embracing the REALNESS of life. Now excuse me while I go do another load of laundry.