Time Marches On

Lately I've been struggling with feels of sadness when I think about the shortness of life.  I find myself full of disappointment because life seems to be going by at speed faster than I can comprehend or keep up with.  I am constantly telling Christian that I wish life would just pause...momentarily and let me catch my breath. I want to just suspend moments and be allowed to take it all in...savor the memories.  I find myself holding Aubrey a little longer before putting her in her crib at night, smelling her sweet fragrance.  I find myself giving more kisses to my husband and capturing his hand at a moment's notice just so I can remember his embrace.  I find myself taking deep breaths and savoring peaceful times like a night walk or a hot bath.

Life is so short.  It is so fleeting.  It's just a wind.  A vapor and it's gone.

I see my grandparents aging and passing on...life is not forever.  I see loved ones taken too soon and leaving behind young families...life is but a moment.  I see my own self changing and maturing...and I have to admit, it's hard.  I have to keep myself from getting too down and discouraged. I have to purposefully see the beauty in each and every second.  I pray the Lord takes this sadness and uses it to teach me the real meaning and purpose of life.

For now, I'm taking each second of life captive.  I'm embracing each and every moment...mundane or magical.  I'm storing memories and special occasions in my heart because that's all I can do.  I can't pause life.  I can't stop it from moving by like a rushing wind.  Instead I have to choose to grab it...hold on tight and let it take me where it may. I must seize every opportunity because quite frankly I may not be given another one.

I'm not going to allow the busyness of life to get in the way of the beauty of life.  I'm choosing to breathe deeper. Let my hugs and kisses linger.  Take longer baths.  Read a book a little later.  Savor a meal and eat an extra piece of pie. Tell my loved ones I love and appreciate them. Choose patience and calmness over chaos. Laugh more.  Praise louder.  Let clothes stay unfolded and play more.

Life isn't something to be taken for granted.  I'm not going to allow the sadness of the realization that life is fleeting to get me down because then I'd just be losing more time. Time that I could be making more special moments and storing up lasting memories with the ones that mean the most to me.

I pray as we see our grandparents, parents and our children age...we won't be filled with sadness or regret but instead recall all the wonderful memories with those loved ones. I thank God for each new day...another chance to love, laugh and be with the ones you love.

Kiss longer...breathe deeper...laugh louder...