When I first learned I was
pregnant, I honestly thought the Lord would never give me a girl. Even though I desperately wanted one, I
figured because of my struggles and insecurities within myself, He’d never
entrust me with a girl...I figured He didn’t think I was ready to handle that
responsibility. I was completely shocked
when I discovered we were having Aubrey, as well as challenged to do my very
best with the gift that He so graciously gave me. I felt as if the Lord was
saying, “it’s okay Ashlee, I trust you…but don’t take this gift lightly. It’s time to step up and be the Godly woman
that Aubrey needs.”
Here I am three months into
motherhood with a daughter, and I feel I am failing miserably at setting good
examples for her as to how to find peace and satisfaction in myself. I’m not teaching her that true beauty comes
from within and our value can only be found in Christ. I’m not showing her that who God made me to
be is perfect and without flaw. How can
I expect her to have healthy views of beauty if I am refusing to see the
truth?
I know I am not the only one
who struggles with this issue. Both
young and old…big and small…short and tall…we all struggle with the desire to
feel beautiful. We long to be desirable.
So why do we continue to feed ourselves lies and believe the devil when he says
we are not good enough, not pretty enough, or not the picture of beauty?
I think it goes back to the
fact that we get into habits of telling ourselves these lies and before long
those lies become daily slogans we believe.
It becomes second nature to find dissatisfaction within ourselves and we
don’t search for the truth…we let the lies pour from our mouths time and time
again without realizing that the words
we speak are poison to ourselves. We try
and scream louder than the voice of our heavenly Father, Who tells us that we
are loved, we are beautiful, we are treasured, we are one of a kind. We turn His words down and instead feast on
our own mistaken thoughts.
I so want Aubrey to have a
confidence and satisfaction in who she is.
I want her to have a healthy outlook of herself and her body. I want her to know that she was created by
the Master and she is a masterpiece. I do not want to be a hindrance to her in
anyway. It shakes me to the core to know
that my actions and words will have a lasting impact on her. Our
girls today need to know they are worthy of love and that they are designed in
His image…making them perfect through Him.
I write all this because I so
desperately want to be the example that I need to be for Aubrey. I am also realizing that my struggles aren’t
going to disappear, in fact I firmly believe that as women, we will struggle
with self worth until the day we die.
But we don’t have to lose the battle.
I will fight with all I have against the devil and his disgusting ways. I wrote this post a while back talking about
how big my God is and how capable He is of bringing us out of darkness.
I need to be held
accountable…I have to change my ways and look to Him alone for my
security. He alone is where I can find
my peace. I am declaring His words as my
anthem. I am also making it my mission
to pray over Aubrey everyday…Claiming that she will always find victory in
knowing who she was made to be. I
encourage you to lift up our young girls, praying desperately for their
generation to be free from the bondages that so many young girls are facing
today.
This is the verse I am
claiming over myself and Aubrey. I’m
going to proclaim it whether or not I’m feeling it or not…cause we all know our
feelings are totally unreliable. We have
to cling to truth.
1
Peter 3:3-4
Don’t be concerned about
the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful
clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from
within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious
to God.
Aw. Loved this post. Every word is true. Aubrey is lucky to have you for a mom, because you know what she needs & you are going to be that Godly woman. Praying for you, friend. :)
ReplyDeleteSomething that Jason and I do at our house is every time either of us says something negative about ourselves, the other person says "Now say three positive things!" I realize that when you are having a bad hair day or your pants don't quite fit the way they used to, that's not exactly the time to want to say anything positive about yourself. But...that's exactly when we should! Sometimes our three things are really lame, but at least they are encouraging, not discouraging. We often times end up laughing, which takes away the frustration of whatever the original negative comment was. :)
ReplyDelete