I was definitely not at work, in my bosses’ office, when a friend/co-worker loudly proclaimed "why on earth do you have on two different colored shoes?" There is absolutely no way I looked down to see this...
No sir, I did see two totally different colors and styles of shoes on my precious little feet. I am always dressed professionally and my shoes always coordinate with each other. I did not spend the next 10 minutes trying to convince my laughing co-workers that I am not always this ditzy.
And if someone tries to tell you that it was me who put my Honda key into my mother's Honda car, please know that they are lying. Nope, I did not ruin my mother's ignition by putting the wrong key into her car. No way, I would never be so clueless as to shove that wrong key harder and harder into the ignition until it could only be professionally removed. If you happen to see a picture of said key, please know that it must be photoshopped because I would never do such a thing.
Oh and last but certainly not least, I am not thrilled to announce that it is LESS THAN A MONTH until I get married! Nope, the wedding is not just weeks away. That must explain all these slip of the mind moments that I seem to be having. I mean...not having.